Saturday, October 30, 2010

It's Time!

We're nearing the end of 2010. It has been an interesting year so far. Though the very best for me is yet to come. Very, very, very soon! :)

Somewhere around after my previous entry in March, I experienced some changes in my body. I felt weak, nauseated, unable to focus and just plain tired. I have never felt such way in my entire life. It happened every morning while I was at work, while furiously finishing or checking drawings. It did occur to me, 'do i really seriously hate my job to be feeling like this?' Which was of course not the case at all. Deep inside I knew my body was changing it's course in life to accept a new life within.

After about a week of feeling yucky, I took a home test. At this point, I was still in denial thinking I probably just caught the flu or some mild virus. I wasn't planning on it. I somehow felt like I was still young (albeit being 29) and I haven't achieved anything yet in life to be taking on a huge responsibility for the rest of my life. Yet I took the test. I had to know. And I got my answer. I was pregnant.

I spent the first few days in a whirlwind of emotions. I was scared, excited, worried and curious all at the same time. I booked an appointment with the doc and she confirmed I was in my 7th week. A week after, I went for a scan and gushed at the scan prints. Wow. Subhanallah. Praise Allah at the tiny life growing inside of me. So tiny and so fragile. I was overwhelmed with joy by now and accepted that I was going to be a mother in November 2010.

Living abroad, I didn't have my parents, relatives or close friends within reach. I had so many questions on what to do and what not to do during the early stages of pregnancy. Talking to my mom on the phone was just not the same as having her in front of me, giving me advice. I had a lot of chat sessions with my cousin Zurien, asking her about her experience when she was pregnant. I think I may have sounded a bit paranoid about a lot of things from food to hospital visits that she said to me, 'Relax. Everybody gets pregnant everyday. It's a normal thing. Don't worry too much'. That helped. I started to take things one step at a time and just enjoyed the ride.

I learned a lot about pregnancy through books and the net. Like I mentioned before, I had no one around to ask. Alhamdulillah, thank god that I had a normal pregnancy and everything that was happening to me was exactly how I read about it. My morning sickness stopped at exactly 12 weeks and everything went smoothly from there on.

I first felt my baby kick at around 20 weeks. I had read that sometimes when you prod your tummy, the baby will respond by prodding you back. So one night, I was lying in bed and wanted to check out if this was true. I put my hand on my tummy and gently pressed down. A few seconds later, something nudged me back. I almost cried. It was the most beautiful thing to have that first interaction with my baby. I called for my husband and told him to do the same thing. And baby responded again. It was a lovely moment.

Fast forward, I am now in my 38th week. Hard to believe I have come this far. It has been a wonderful journey I will never forget. I loved every single minute of it and every single movement the baby makes. When I first found out I had conceived, a friend had told me she misses being pregnant. At that time I just wondered how can anybody miss being sick and feeling bloated for nine months? And now I understand completely. Once my baby is born, I know I will miss feeling him (yes, it's a boy!) inside of me, being so close to him, talking to him and worrying each time I don't feel him move or kick me (to indicate he's well and fine).

Being pregnant has taught me the love and sacrifice of being a mom. And how our mothers felt when they were carrying us. And how much we sometimes hurt them with our words and actions growing up. I hope to teach my son well about love and respect and I want him to grow into a beautiful person. Just as beautiful as how my pregnancy with him was.

My due date is on the 8th of November. I would love that date, as it's the opposite of my 11th of August birth date. But I've always had the feeling I will be delivering earlier than that. I had a 'show' yesterday morning, indicating labour is imminent. So far, I haven't felt any signs of starting contractions yet. Which is good, as I really want my husband to be by my side when I go into labour. He will be arriving in KL from Dubai on early Monday morning. I've been whispering to baby to wait till his daddy comes home. I think and hope that's what he wants too.. :)

Sunday, March 14, 2010

What to do first?

Is it March already?! Eek! So time does not wait for anyone. *Light bulb moment!* Hahaha.

I've been so busy at the office, working like a robot. Meaning, like I'm doing things on auto mode, getting tasks done, though knowing what I'm doing and hopefully doing them right. But my heart is just.. lost. I love what I do and I love all the things that come with it, but why is my heart lost?

Could it be being away from work for such a long time has frozen my drive and enthusiasm? Or could it be that I know I'm destined for better things (which have not happened at the moment) and what I'm going through now is just an intermission to a more interesting and exciting life, so I have unconsciously switched myself to auto mode, to pass time?

When people ask me 'How's work?', I answer, 'Great! Loving it!'. Which is quite true, I am loving my job. But I am not 100% purely, insanely happy. [Note: this only applies to my working career. I am 100% purely and insanely happy with my love life and family life].

I hope I find what my heart is missing. Soon. ASAP.

In the meantime, I need to plan a trip to Europe. Possibly for the end of the year but more likely to be in the first quarter of 2011. I need to list down where I want to go, what I want to see. And I need to sit down and read the Dummies Guide to Europe I just bought.

I also want to write a book, though I have no idea what I want to write about.

And I want to play computer games. I used to do so much of that all these years. But with work at the office and tending to my husband at home, I really can't find time to. I somehow feel playing computer games gets me in motion. Triggers my brain. Makes me more aware.

Hmm.. maybe that's what I really need to help me not feel like the undead...

Monday, January 18, 2010

The Cowboy Trip

I say cowboy because in my language (spelt 'koboi') it means unplanned, unsuspected and in other words, 'roughing it' (no offense to any cowboys out there, but cowboys are rough n rugged n sometimes can be dashingly handsome!) :) . 'Koboi' is not a registered word in the Malay dictionary, so don't go looking for it!

Anyways, I promised pics from my trip. I've put them all up in Facebook, so I'll just put one or two here. A little bit about my trip... There were 12 people in the group. We left Dubai at around 11pm on the 25th of November 2009. The person in charge had rented a coaster (sort of like a mini bus) which came with a driver (thank god) and we glided through the night heading for Musandam, Oman.

After all the necessary passport clearances at the UAE-Oman border, we finally reached our destination at about 3am. We stopped at a rocky beach to rest, get some shut eye and wake up in time to catch the sun rise. By the time we had set up tents and figured out whether to sleep in the tents or ditch the tents and sleep in the coaster (hard rocky beaches can be very cold and unforgivingly give you a full body reflexology) it was already 4.30am. Which meant we only had a few hours to sleep. So sleep we did. I chose the tent.

Woke up at 7.30 and was just in time to watch the sun rise from the jagged rocky mountain landscape. Masyaallah, the surrounding scenery was beautiful! We couldn't see much when we arrived as it was quite dark. So to wake up to the breathtaking sight was a treat! Cameras poised, we started snapping away. Freshening up was a problem as the only facility on the beach was a 4 cubicle male and female toilet. No showering it seems. But it's a beach. And there's no shower? So we brushed our teeth and washed our faces. That'll do. For now.

Sunrise at the beach

Professionals at work

The coaster

Drove to Khasab town to get brekkie and scout for the cheapest adventure package we could get. Adventure package meaning mountain safari and sea tour. Ok, not so adventurous after all, I guess. :D Breakfast was 'roti canai' or paratha with curry. Yum. Best roti canai I've had since moving to the UAE. And I got it in Oman. Funny.

After much negotiation, we got a good deal for our two-day package from one of the many travel agents in town. When it was time for the mountain safari, three 4WD's came to pick us up. One was a Toyota, one a GMC and the last one.. a Hummer! Be still my heart. Ok, Hummers may not be THE dream car and not many people would want to own one (unless you have loads of money and have no other car in mind to buy, or you live next to rocky mountains and a Hummer might only be the most stylish viable choice) but to at least get to ride in the thing would make anyone happy. Right? So anyway, I didn't push my way through to secure myself a seat but instead let the organisers of the trip have their few hours of bliss. *Sigh* So my husband and I trotted over to the least appealing of the three, the Toyota. *Sigh*

The mountain safari

View from the top

The mountain safari was alright. Nothing out of the ordinary. Just views of the rocky mountains from above. All four of us in the Toyota fell in and out of sleep from the lack of it the night before. I kept banging my head against the window every time I dozed off. Which later resulted in a mild headache. Ouch.

It was quite dark when we went back to the beach to set up tent again and prepare for our barbeque. Everyone was tired but in a good mood and we ate, chatted and went to sleep. I again chose the tent. I just love freezing to death and roll on stones in my sleep..

The next morning we packed up and headed to the docks for our sea tour. Please note, we haven't showered since we arrived with the excuse that we'll get to jump into the water when the dhow (name for traditional boat in the region) drops anchor for the snorkeling session. Our mums would have been so proud of us! So the dhow cruised into the open waters and along rocky cliffs. The water was a deep green and was oh-so-enchanting. When we reached a tiny rocky island where the snorkeling session was to take place, everyone jumped to their feet in excitement only to find out our dhow (and tour agent) didn't provide enough snorkeling gear and life vests! This was rather unsettling as other dhows (from other tour agents) around us provided each person on its vessel with a life vest if not with snorkeling gear. We only had 3 or 4 life vests and about 5 or 6 snorkeling masks. And our dhow was carrying about 30 adults and children! The children snapped up all the gear in no time.

My husband is not a good swimmer so he really needed a life vest if he was to jump into the water. Mind you, it was deep open water and more than a 100 meter swim to the rocky island. Even I had doubts whether to jump in or not and I am quite a good swimmer! Only half of our group jumped in in the end including me and my husband. He managed to get a life vest when one of the kids was done with it. The water was so refreshing and I felt a bit cleaner after not showering for 2 days! I can't say the same for the rest who chose not to jump in though. I'm sure they were very disappointed as we were all looking forward to it.

The docks

Swim, but please don't drown in the process

On the way back to the docks, as promised, a small school of dolphins followed our dhow and jumped out of the water then and again. That was probably the highlight of the whole trip! Everyone was so excited and shouted 'oooouuuhhh' and 'aaaaahhhhh' every time the cute thing displayed its acrobatic skills.

Hi cutie!

Our coaster headed home that evening. Everyone was tired, exhausted but at the same time happy with the trip. We saw some amazing sights, made new friends and talked about going on another adventure. When and where has yet to be determined.

And if we have to rough it again, 'koboi' style, I say, bring it on! :)

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

A New Chapter

I finally got a job. Been working for a month now. Loving it! Mainly because now I have more challenging tasks to be tackled everyday instead of harvesting my crops on Farmville! Looking back, I seriously do not know how I passed 15 months, jobless (yes, I said 15 months!). Mind boggling, really. And during those months, those close to my heart have continuously reminded me to enjoy the time I have (being jobless) because when I do get a job, I will miss having all the time to myself. Proud to say, I spent my time in those many months well, cherished it and now am ready to take on the world! Okay, one step at a time..

Tomorrow will be an exciting day. As Thursday is the start of a 3-day Eid Ul Adha holiday here in the UAE, our boss has kindly (and rather surprisingly) arranged for a company paintball event. And has also given us half day off as to make sure we arrive at the paintball venue on time. Great, I have a feeling I will get hit severely this time around. *please refer to previous entry on my paintball experience*

After the game, we will all be treated to dinner and then I have to rush back home, gather my stuff (and my husband) and join Bak and friends on a trip to Musandam, Oman. The rented coaster will leave at 11pm. I hope I make it on time.

I'm not really sure what we'll be doing in Musandam, but Bak did mention snorkeling and dolphins. Sounds interesting. Even more interesting, the trip will be 2 days and 2 nights, with no sleeping arrangements. Meaning, we will sleep in the coaster, by the side of the road and will brush our teeth at any restrooms we can find. Nice. I haven't roughed it for quite some time. And I don't mind it at all, really. It will be quite refreshing I'm sure.

Well, I have to go pack now. I need to dig for thick clothes for the paintball gig. And gather my bathing attire for swimming with the dolphins. Hope I'll be back soon with pics from my trip.

Saturday, July 18, 2009

My Cousin Is Married!

Yes, I have kicked myself repeatedly for not updating. Not so much because people will have nothing to read (god knows if people even read my blog!). But it's more about discipline and fulfilling something I've started in my life.

So, cousin Aida got married on the 3rd & 4th of August. The solemnisation ceremony was on the 3rd and the reception was on the 4th. It was a beautiful wedding. I especially liked the 'nikah' (solemnisation). It felt like we were in a different world. With fairy lights and flowers everywhere, I imagined myself in a private garden far away from the city. In reality, Aida's parents house is just by the side of a fairly busy road!

The few weeks coming up to the wedding, I spent most of my days at Aida's, helping prepare all sorts of stuff. From gluing coasters on gift boxes, to cutting ribbons, to gluing ribbons to bottles, to filling gift boxes with nest-like paper. I also had to accompany Aida to the designer's and buy last minute bits and pieces. The weeks were hectic, but I loved every minute of it as I reminisced the days and the fun I had leading up to my wedding last year.

Speaking of my wedding last year...


Yup, today is our one year anniversary! My god.. has it been a year already?? Doesn't feel like it. I think I should take life as it comes and stop counting days and years. That way, I'll always feel young and not take my age into account. Hmm, yes, I'm in denial. Let me be..

It's not a good feeling to celebrate your anniversary away from your hubby. I am still in Malaysia and Cha is in Dubai. Can't wait to give him a big hug when I return to Dubai in mid August.

Back to Aida, or should I say Puan Aida ;) Congratulations! (again). Hope you and Azman will live a beautiful life together and be blessed with many darling little children.

We're waiting for Adelin now..... ;)

Thursday, May 14, 2009


My friend 'L' reminded me I had a blog. :D

I am now back on home soil, fabulous Malaysia! I'm glad to be back, just a bit heartbroken to leave my hubby in Dubai. Will be seeing him soon in July when he comes back for cousin Aida's wedding.

I am not kidding when I say Malaysia's heat is just unbearable. When I left Dubai, the temperature over there clocked in at 43degs Celsius. Yes, its a big number but somehow not as deathly draining as Malaysia's 30 something degrees weather. I was told it hasn't been raining for quite some time so maybe that's why I feel like I'm trapped in a sauna.

And because it has been so hot, with the sun beaming its delightful rays upon us, my skin has darkened significantly. I actually feel burnt! My mom just commented a week and a half ago when I touched down at KLIA that I had gotten fairer living in Dubai. Well, since I've been home-bound jobless for the past nine months (if I had gotten preggers, I would have had a baby right now), its no wonder I lightened up from lack of sun exposure. And now, after just a mere one and a half weeks, my efforts of pale-ing myself have been thwarted. Damn.

Wednesday, April 1, 2009

Gets me everytime!

I was watching an episode of Oprah and she talked about the 'Christian the lion' video which had generated millions of views on youtube. I had seen the video a few months ago and cried my eyes out as I am such a sucker for things like this. Later that day, when my husband came home from work I showed him the video and cried my eyes out again watching it with him. Then the next day, I emailed the video link to my mom and for fun, I watched the video again. And cried my eyes out again!

And yes, you guessed it! I was bawling like a baby when I saw the clip again on Oprah! Thanks Oprah. I needed to clear my eyes out of Dubai dust.

So anyways, last Saturday I went for Coldplay's concert in Abu Dhabi with my husband and a couple of friends. Weather forecast showed that it was going to rain that day and I was sooo hoping that it wouldn't as the concert was outdoors. Or at least rain during the day so we could enjoy the concert at night.

As if on cue, it started to rain lightly when we were lining up to get into the venue. Good thing we had plastic bags to put our mobiles and other stuff in. It continued to drizzle for quite some time and still I was hoping it would stop before the concert started.

The rain did stop, thank god. Coldplay came out on time and started performing. They were so great! The sound system was superb. We were singing along and jumping up and down. All the while, thunder was rumbling and lighting was illuminating the sky. And then suddenly, probably halfway through the concert, when Coldplay was performing Yellow, rain came pouring down like mad! I was drenched! The only thing I had to cover my head with was a pashmina. It's not plastic. So it didn't help. I had to wring water out of it once in a while and put it over my head again. Even so, Coldplay continued playing so we tried our best to pay attention through the cold shower.

Like Coldplay's performance, the skies gave it their all and the rain stopped after about 30 mins. The show went on and we continued to scream our hearts out to their songs. Since that day the whole world was celebrating Earth Hour, I noticed Coldplay only put minimal lighting for most of their slow songs. There was even a time when Chris Martin asked for the lights to be turned off and he asked everybody in the audience to hold up their mobile phones' lights.

Another highlight of the concert was when Chris brought a lady up on stage because it was her birthday that day. Apprently, the lady's sisters were screaming at Chris (they were all standing right in front of the extended stage) and he heard, and he said the right thing to do was to bring her up on stage since it was her birthday and it had been raining. Lucky her!!

The concert ended with an encore where Coldplay played The Scientist and Life in Technicolor. It was a great concert. The best I've been to so far. I can't stop watching the video clips I took. Gives me goosebumps (not tears!) everytime!